The Flat Earth Society

Flat Earth

The flat Earth from space.

For many, many years the belief has been that the world is round but the Flat Earth Society begs to differ. The society was founded back in the early 1800’s by Samuel Birley Rowbotham, an English inventor. His system was called Zetetic Astronomy and held that the North Pole is actually the center of our flat world and Antarctica is actually a 150-foot-tall wall of ice running along the edge of the world with the sun, moon, planets and stars all swirling just a few thousand miles above our heads. So basically we are living in a giant playpen. A playpen that the Flat-Earthers believe NASA is guarding the edges of to keep us all from climbing out of and falling to our inevitable demise.

The Flat Earth

Image of flat Earth showing the cycle of the sun and moon.

They believe that our day and night cycles are the result of the sun and moon, 32 mile wide spheres, that move in circles a mere 3,000 miles above us. And where does the moon go during lunar eclipses? It is obscured by an invisible “anti-moon”. Oh, and gravity? That’s a myth. That glass didn’t actually fall to the ground but instead the ground slammed into it at 32 miles per second. And, according to the Flat Earth Society, we are being pushed upwards by a strange and mysterious force with a very technical name, dark energy.

The Flat Earth Society is not being fooled by all those images of the big blue marble either. Those were all photoshopped. And don’t trust the GPS, those have been tampered with to make pilots believe they are flying around a sphere when actually they are just flying around in a circle like a dog chasing its tail. The dastardly bastards behind the conspiracy have been making us look like idiots for years and the reason for it is as yet unknown, though the Flat-Earthers believe it may be financially beneficial. Or maybe the “They” that pull the strings behind the curtain were bored one day and thought ‘Hey, we’re bored. You know what would be fun? To see if we can convince Joe that the Earth is round.’ and from there the whole thing just spiraled out of control.

At one time the Flat Earth Society had over 3,000 members but according to the membership register on their website there is now only 421 official members. They are not taking new members currently as their president is away.

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